“I understand just what you’re going through.” “I’ve been in your shoes.”
Those are two of my least favorite lines from one of my most favorite songs, “The Walk” by Sawyer Brown.
In the lyrics, lead singer Mark Miller shares the story of a father helping his boy deal with life’s stresses at various stages, explaining that they are parts of life we all face.
Kind of.
My response to “I understand just what you’re going through”: No, you don’t.
My reply to “I’ve been in your shoes”: No, you haven’t.
Not exactly anyway.
Each one of us leaves individual footprints on this earth, as we all have unique experiences that make us who we are. As a result of these millions of experiences, no one of us is exactly like another. And, as such, we respond and react differently in various situations.
Psychologists would like us to believe we all fit nicely into a handful of personality types. I have been fascinated with this approach and have studied the various theories since my early twenties, mostly to help me better understand what motivates different types of people. Thirty years later, I am still learning, as I continue to meet people who don’t quite fit into the precast molds. I don’t understand what they are going through, because I haven’t been in their shoes.
I have come to accept that our unique experiences should be cherished. We clearly need to find common ground and celebrate how we are alike, but we also need to understand that we have important differences, too. That’s why we all react differently to difficult challenges like divorce, disasters, disease, death and other horrible things that don’t start with a D.
Meanwhile, I fully agree with another line in Sawyer Brown’s song: “Don’t worry, boy; it will be all right.”
Yes, it will.
Have a marvelous Monday, and thanks for reading.
Shane Goodman
President and Publisher
Big Green Umbrella Media
shane@dmcityview.com
515-953-4822, ext. 305 | 
